Honestly, I remember it being easier last year.
I recall a spurt just after midnight on 1st November 2009 when I just couldn't stop writing. It was a great feeling. Silly me, I anticipated something similar this year, especially considering that the idea has been been permeating in my head for quite a while now.
No such luck.
Before I went to bed in the early hours of 1st November 2010 I'd completed only a paltry 1200 words. Then, due to my other commitments, I forbade myself from working on the story until after nine 0'clock that evening. Well, by then I didn't want to. I'd got into the research zone as far as my PhD was concerned and after that I got into the procrastination zone. I finally limply across the finish line for that day but since I did it after midnight it counted as an unsuccessful day in the NaNoWriMo stats.
I feel as if somebody kicked me out of the field and locked the gate. The sad truth is, my time this November is very constrained. I'm scooting about all over the place (I've got university today then I'm away for two nights for starters), I've got a ton of research to do and sleeping is unfortunately becoming a priority in my life.
However, I'm not giving up hope just yet. I know these characters. I love these characters. In one form or another they've been swimming around my brain for five years. The platform I intended to give them changed three times but the characters stayed the same.
This is story is coming out of me one way or the other. There's an excellent blog over at Writing Spirit explaining the levels of NaNo goals. I'm particularly drawn to number three: complete your first draft, no matter how many words it is.
This isn't a white flag or a surrender. When I'm finally back at my desk and in the zone I think there's every chance I'll bumble my way through the other 48,206 words. I'm just mentally preparing myself for the fact that it may not happen this year and trying to convince my stubborn brain that it would be no crime.
It's not really listening to me right now...